Well, since we hope to greet our second boy in a few short weeks, I thought I might touch on how this pregnancy has gone. It is hard to believe, but when people ask if this time around has been easier, I think I would have to say no. I am so blessed not to have been on bed rest and chasing Co around definitely keeps me from sitting around stewing about every little detail like I did with him, but I still take more than my fair share of stewing moments when I get a moment's silence. This time has just been plain hard. Oh so worth it, but hard. I think, which I never imagined, I will be mom to two boys. I just don't think I can go through this again and Chris gets nervous at the talk of three rug rats, anyway. He says they will outnumber us then. Plus, we would most likely end up with another boy. So, no pink. No princesses. No American Girl dolls. No unbelievably cute clothes with lady bugs, strawberries or other things I could not get away with dressing the boys in. But, that is ok. This is obviously God's plan for us and I am completely and totally in love with a 2 year old little boy already who has shown all the things there are to love about boys.
Anyway, I thought at the beginning I may be having a girl because I felt so much sicker than I did with Cohen. Although, I have found my memory is not exactly the best. And I think trying to keep up with Cohen magnified the sickness. Being on bed rest vs. full time mom is quite the change in scenarios! We also struggled all winter starting at Thanksgiving with one sickness after another. Seemed like one of us was sick all the time. At the worst, we were all sick at once. I was more sick in the last 6 months than I have been in the last 6 years! And Chris never gets sick. And Cohen was completely healthy his first year. So, it was overwhelming. We would maybe get a week or so break, then amazingly get another round! So we were ready for spring when it rolled around and it seems like the sicknesses have at least spread out some.
The most unexpected and somewhat scary incident happend the first week of February, though. We were having a run-of-the-mill Friday night. We had run some errands and had dinner when we decided to get crazy and rent a movie. Never mind we were gambling on the fact we either a) would never watch the movie b) would watch part of the movie or c) would pay a late fee so we could take the time necessary to finish it. Nevertheless, Chris ran in to rent one of the pre-approved movies we had discussed and I stayed in the car with Cohen. Cohen was upset because he wanted to tag along. As I was trying to calm him down and reason with him, I found myself grasping for words that weren't there. Everything came out mumbo-jumbo. At leat Cohen calmed down to give me a quizzical look because even he recognized how odd I sounded. At the same time, I received a simple text that I could not comprehend. I read and re-read it attempting to understand it. The whole car was spinning and the radio seemed to get exponentially louder, causing ringing in my head. When Chris came back, I struggled to explain to Chris what had happened. I stuttered and struggled and he tried to remain calm, asking me several questions. He pulled the car over and gave me a stroke test like raising my arms and whatnot. I seemed to pass that and assured him I didn't need to go to the ER, but we needed to get Cohen home and to bed. He reluctantly headed home. I continued to stutter but seemed to slowly improve. When I got out of the car, I was tipsy and had trouble standing, but kept going. I was just exhausted and had to sit down. Chris got Cohen to bed and came out of Cohen's room asking if I was ready to watch the movie. I had a nagging feeling I should not ignore this episode, so I had Chris call the doctor on-call who told us to go immediately to the ER. I was flustered and upset, but we called my sister to come stay with Cohen. She arrived in pajamas and I decided Chris should stay with Co if my sister was willing to drive me to the hospital. My parents had decided to take a rare trip out of town to see the WSU Shocker basketball team play in Northern Iowa. My sister was a good sport and though totally unprepared to go out in public, took me to the ER. I thought it would be a late night nuisance and waste of a co-pay and they would send me home with looks on their faces like they felt sorry for this hypochondriac. In fact, if I weren't 16 weeks pregnant I would probably have stayed home eating popcorn and staying up way too late watching our movie. The thought had crossed my mind that I had also made a trip to the ER at 16 weeks with Cohen that resulted in bed rest.
I was really surprised after several questions and simple tests they told me they were going to admit me. I hadn't packed for this! I hadn't been away from Cohen for one night! I guess they noticed I was still struggling to formulate thoughts and suspected a stroke. The autoimmune disorder I have makes my blood clot too much, but with my daily injections and medication, the possibility of stroke was far from my mind. My ob was called and he agreed I needed to stay. It was late by now and they were calling in a ct scan person. That test was miserable! I had to have my head wedged in one place for about half an hour while these super loud noises were directed at me. All I could do was close my eyes, pray and forget I am claustrophobic. When that was done, I was eventually wheeled up to a room where the nurse interrogated me for what seemed like hours. I eventually fell asleep about 5 AM at the end of it. My sister had gone home to change and also go by my house to grab a bag Chris had put together. She came back up and fell asleep during the interrogation as well. They came in and woke us up to take blood. Then began a day of tests. I had a neck sonogram where we also found out we were having a boy! That was the highlight of the trip. Then I had occupational therapy where I walked down the hall clomping with my left foot like I couldn't quite pick it up. I had a consult with a neurologist and had to wait all day for a heart sonogram. I am glad the neurologist came in, otherwise I may not have gotten any answers. He asked me a bunch of questions and right before he left, he looked at my eyes. "Hmmm. Interesting. Have you always had a droopy left eyelid?" No. What are you talking about? He said one pupil was slightly larger than the other and he suspected I had Horner's Syndrome. He said that might explain some things and he would be back after he looked at my tests again. He came back and explained that there were a couple of things he saw. On the ct scan, there was a small, white dead spot on my brain and in my neck sonogram the blood flow indicated a dissected carotid artery. So, basically I did have a TIA, but they were not sure how all this tied in. The course of action was to double the blood thinner shots I was already on and hope the dissected artery would repair itself in a few months. Further tests could not be done until I had the baby. I would follow up with the neurologist's partner. After learning all this, I really just wanted to go home. Chris brought Cohen to visit me, but he was freaked out by all the ivs and everything hospital-like. They told me I could not go home at least until some blood clotting number was a certain level. I was more than upset to stay another exhausting night when the nurse returned and said all my doctors agreed I could go home. What a weird experience!
Well, I haven't had any more "stroke" symptoms and my follow-up neck sonogram was clear. After meeting with the neurologist last week, I will have one more test after the baby is born to determine the course of action for the future regarding blood thinner medications. I have three injections a day and a handful of medications to take. I have had a few other set-backs and worries, but everything seems to be ok now. We started weekly sonograms 5 weeks ago at 32 weeks and so far, this baby is passing faster than Cohen did. He seems to be a mover! Not sure how that will translate when he is born.
Overall, I am excited, anxious and apprehensive. We do not have the nursery ready or all of the things we need. I am also very aware that my time with Cohen will never be the same again, which makes me sad. Cohen is already more attached to Chris right now, calling for him in the night and being upset in the morning when he is not there. When we meet Chris for lunch during the week, he is upset when he goes back to work and not home with us. I try not to take it personally. I hope Cohen adjusts well and enjoys having a brother. I know it will take time and presents new challenges, but we are glad he can have a sibling and we are adding to our family.
Chances are you will not hear from us again for awhile, but the plan is to be induced Monday, July 8th. We appreciate any prayers as we know as much as we plan, anything can happen!
